This month’s feature articles:

Regular monthly features:

World Stupidity Awards 2005
(from an article by Canadian Press, in Toronto Star)

Each year at the "Just for Laughs" comedy festival in Montreal, the awards are given to the stupidest things in our world.

Here are some of the most noteworthy at the 3rd annual awards:

Stupidest Government Award – Canada for the Gomery inquiry into the sponsorship scandal.

Stupidest Statement of the Year – George Bush "They never stop thinking of ways of harming America and neither do we."

Dumbest Moment of the Year – Ashlee Simpson’s lip-synching performance on Saturday Night Live show.

Stupidest Movie of the Year – Alien vs. Predator

Stupidest Trend of the Year – crystal meth amphetamines

Stupidest Award Show – The World Stupidity Awards

Awards were decided by internet voters and the show was overseen by the Academy Recognizing Stupidity Everywhere (ARSE).

Dec 2 – International Day for the Abolition of Slavery

Dec 3 – International Day of Disabled Persons

Dec 5 – International Volunteer Day for Economic and Social Development

Dec 7 – International Civil Aviation Day

Dec 10 – Human Rights Day

Dec 11 – International Mountain Day

Dec 15 – Full Moon tonight

Dec 18 – International Migrant’s Day

Dec 21 – First day of Winter

Dec 25 – Christian Xmas Day

Dec 26 – Jewish First day of Hanukkah, start of Kwansaa

Dec 29 – International Day for Biological Diversity

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Rather than focussing on two unusual careers, you are directed to some websites that will stretch you into some new territory.

Really unusual jobs and careers can be rewarding financially and satisfying. Many people limit themselves to common, ordinary, run-of-the-mill jobs. Check out these creative jobs that are quite different. If they are not for you, they may stimulate some ideas and directions in which to go look for a career that is just right for you. Just remember, you don’t always have to work for somebody.

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"Accent on Essential Life Skills" – a manual of 48 "how to" skills that enhance and enrich life and learning in a holistic way. The skills are for children and adults. Use the skills in personal, educational, and business settings. Teachers and business people will find it particularly valuable.

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• the University of Alaska covers four time zones.
• Tax studies show that the top 10% of all taxpayers contribute more than half of Canada’s tax revenue. Individuals who earn more than $115,000 in taxable income pay 46.4% in tax in Ontario.
• A University of London study found that emailing and text messaging constantly can actually reduce mental capability by an average of 10 points on I.Q. tests – 5 points for women and 15 for men.
• Many years ago, in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden" and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
• The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime-time TV were the cartoon figures Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
• The average number of people airborne over the US at any hour is 61,000.
• Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
• The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

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Ok, Who Wants to Chess Box?
(from an article by Valdis Wish, Toronto Star)

Berlin has a new extreme sport that melds brains and brawn. Chess Boxing is one of the newest and weirdest sports available for sports lovers.

Contestants play chess for four minutes and then box in a ring for two minutes. Then back to the chessboard. The chess match can last a maximum of twelve minutes. A "bullet" version of the game gives players only three minutes per chess match to move their pieces.

Iepe Rbingh, a 31-year-old Dutch artist is the inventor. He includes scantily clad women carrying number cards around the ring to identify the round. An announcer works the crowd into a frenzy.

There is a limitation to its popularity. The boxing fans might not understand chess and chess fans might not find the violence of the boxing appealing.

It is worth a try and it is easy to follow.

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Working faster inside Spreadsheet Cells: In spreadsheets, most people highlight the cell and then to write in it, go to the top of the document to the data line in order to change the text or placements of words. That uses valuable time to move the mouse back and forth. Here are two simple and quick ways to speed things up:

Click on a cell to get the bold border. Set the cursor inside the box and double click. The cursor flashes inside the box and you can now change the text.

1. To move words in a cell down to the next line in the cell, follow instruction No. 1 to enter a cell, locate the cursor at the front of the word that you want to move down to the next line. Hold down the "Alt" key and press "Enter". ____________________________________________

(from an article by Sandro Contenta, Toronto Star)

We have all been irritated by people who don’t respect property, peace and quiet, or maintain civil relationships with fellow citizens. The British have a novel way of solving this.

Anti-social Behaviour Orders (Asbos) are the weapons that Brits can use against loud neighbours, unruly children, irritating smells, etc. Asbos restrict behaviour for a minimum of 2 years. They are civil court injunctions requested by local authorities and can involve prison sentences.

Despite what may be considered "Nazi-like" and approaches to unacceptable behaviour, about 89% of people find them acceptable and they are very popular despite being highly controversial. They have been applied since 1998. About 4000 were handed out in the last two years. They require little evidence and are easily applied, sometimes with a complaint and/or even hearsay evidence. This is a concern to civil liberties groups.

With all things like this, there are good and bad points:

The Good Injunctions:

• stop or evict rowdy people who annoy neighbours
• remove drug dealers from neighbourhoods or even towns
• address those involved in gang activity and other hooligan acts
• make parents responsible for their children’s behaviour
• can apply directly to children who must take responsibility for their actions (there is a concern about stigmatizing them through "naming and shaming")
• keep animals from being loosed by irresponsible owners

The Questionable Injunctions:

• a 23-year-old woman was banned from jumping into rivers and onto railway lines in an attempt to commit suicide
• a 50-year-old woman got one for hitting her brother with a rubarb stick
• an 85-year-old man received one for being repeatedly sarcastic
• a one-legged man with learning disabilities got one for begging
• a 27-year-old woman got one for appearing in her garden and answering the door in her underwear

Christmas is the season when people run out of money before they run out of friends. – Larry Wilde

"The gun can kill you up to the grave, but the media can kill you beyond the grave until infinity." – Imelda Marcos

"This thing that we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down. -Mary Pickford

"An actor’s a guy who, if you ain’t talking about him, ain’t listening. " – Marlon Brando

A blonde, brunette and a redhead, two giraffes and a duck, a farmer, a lawyer and an accountant, an Irishman, an Englishman and a Canadian walk into a bar. "Hold it," said the bartender. "What kind of joke is this."

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Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench

under a tree when one turned to the other and said . . . "Slim, I'm 83 years

old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age.

How do you feel?"

Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."

"Really!? Like a new-born baby!?"

"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."

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